Empathy

"Empaths are highly sensitive, finely tuned instruments when it comes to emotions. They feel everything, sometimes to an extreme, and are less apt to intellectualize feelings. Intuition is the filter through which they experience the world."

Being someone who has had their fair share of physical aliments, I think I grew accustomed to pushing away emotional aspects of who I am as an individual. Throughout my years in school, teachers would compliment me, saying that my intuitive knowledge and sensitivity will bring me great success throughout life. I never understood how being sensitive was a positive thing. I thought being strong and putting on a tough face was more admirable. 

Highly sensitive people seem to receive a negative dictation. They're perceived as weak. I think the people who are not expressing their authentic feelings show more signs of fragility. To feel intensity in any form isn't a symptom of a weak person, it is what makes us feel truly alive. There's no shame in the things we aspire and dream of. These things need to be cultivated in order to work towards a more humane, caring world. 

I do not consider myself a religious person. I never felt like the ideologies of most religions aligned with me, and having a hard time getting behind something that I don't feel one hundred percent confident in, I was never a very devout catholic. At a young age I went to religious instruction for a few weeks over the summer. I remember feeling like I didn't fit in and that I was very different. I was quiet, kept to myself, and always had a million thoughts and feelings stuck in my head. This feeling has stuck with me throughout the years, and is something I still struggle to make sense of. Recently I came across the term "Empath." I googled it and read about all these people who can feel the emotion and energy of people around them.  They consider it to be a gift. For the first time I felt like these people online were describing all of my thoughts that I have never been able to put into words. 

When I looked further into being an Empath, I came across the psychic people who claim to be able to read your future, and I became skeptical. I don't know enough about what these people do, so I can't provide much insight with that. I just have my reservations, I am still not sure what's real and what's not. All I know for sure is the emotion that I receive from simply being around people, it's difficult for me to understand. It's confusing to dictate which feelings are my own and which belong to others. 

 One of the first experiences that I've had was at a pizzeria down the block from my apartment. I was having lunch when an overwhelming wave of tension and frustration crashed over me. Intuitively I felt the feeling coming from an older man and what seemed to be his son. It became clear to me that there was tension with those two men. Once they started talking, their conversation turned into an argument. I was thinking to myself, "Why do I feel this way? I don't even know these people." I was unable to shake the feeling until they left. I felt like I could catch people's feelings like the way you catch a cold. The more aware I am, the more I can recognize when I'm having experiences like these instead of ignoring them. It sounds weird. A few years ago I don't think I would fully believe someone if they told me all of this with a straight face.

I would like to become better at managing how other people's energies absorb into me and effect me. I plan on learning more about this topic with an open mind. I find that not only is it so important to feel physically well, it's also imperative to be at your best mentally. I'm striving towards an equal balance in being the best, healthiest version of me. 

-Dani